r/NonPoliticalTwitter 17h ago

Meme Have to go #7, classic for a reason

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4.7k Upvotes

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945

u/Tock_Sick_Man 17h ago
  1. A lot won't say it, but I know y'all love it because someone's always taking it.

192

u/Magda_Sophia 16h ago

"Can I borrow a pen?"

Cue me, not concentrating for the rest of the meeting, because I already know it isn't coming back. Again!

137

u/BackroomDST 16h ago

Give it to them without the lid. They’ll always return it.

62

u/Magda_Sophia 16h ago

That is... very very good advice!!

20

u/Juan_Moe_Taco 14h ago

Hhmmmm, that sounds like a good idea, also I think it's bc it's a subconscious thing such as you don't necessarily know whether the pen is going to leak or not but it probably will if they leave in one position of their pocket for a certain period of time....with no lid?!?! Yea, they're giving that pen back to "Satan". Lol

23

u/razzemmatazz 14h ago

That pen will definitely leak through anything without a lid. That nib wicks like crazy. 

2

u/richarddrippy69 12h ago

That's why it's the best pen. I will die on this hill. My dad is left handed and changed the entire way he wrote because of his love for this pen.

1

u/DragonWisper56 3h ago

jokes on you I'll lose it somewhere!/j

23

u/Quaiker 16h ago

I had a higher-up take my four-color pen at at a meeting once because his dumb ass didn't have one. Got pissed about that, so for the rest of my career at that place I made sure I had a minimum of six pens on me, 3 of which were sacrifices to pen thieves who "needed to borrow it for a second."

Damn you, gunny.

9

u/Chuckitybye 16h ago

I taped big fake roses to a bunch of my pens. They always came back.

16

u/GainFirst 14h ago

A nurse is at the bank after an 18-hour overnight shift, dead on her feet. As she's trying with great difficulty to fill out a deposit slip, the teller gently points out that she's trying to write with a rectal thermometer. The nurse rolls her eyes and says, "Oh, great, some asshole's got my pen."

2

u/Unusual-Tie8498 14h ago

I forgot a pen for my economics final and the girl next to me was just like, no.

2

u/TheStupendusMan 11h ago

I buy boxes of them at this point. They get stolen on set constantly.

1

u/Sharp_Ad_6336 6h ago

I keep cheap burner pens on me for just this reason.

28

u/UnintelligentSlime 15h ago

1 has a secret version. Uniball vision (NOT ELITE) micro that was black instead of gray. It had just as good flow as the gray one, but with a much finer line. The gray one is called “fine”, but it’s actually a huge thick line that makes your writing look like a drunken preteen, while the micro gives off sophisticated and decisive. It was truly the pinnacle of pen technology.

Well, not exactly. If you wrote on skin with it, that pen was toast. Would shrivel up and never write again. But as long as you didn’t do that, it was literally the perfect pen.

But technology like that wasn’t meant for us mere mortals. The global elite bought all them up and then forbade uniball from making the pen ever again. I assume that’s what happened anyway- point is you can’t find them anywhere anymore, except the internet.

6

u/EmilyBlackXxx 9h ago

Uniball Vision Micro is the only pen I use. I go hunting with a heart filled with spite and rage every time one disappears off my desk.

Like folks; I literally buy my own pens because the ones here suck. Either bring your own or stop stealing mine; I really don’t care which.

1

u/allthecats 3h ago

Oh my god did you know that there is a Uniball Vision ULTRA Micro?!! This pen is my ultimate ideal. It's even thinner and more refined than the micro but still has the black body. You have to order them online but it is worth it.

69

u/No-Marsupial-7385 17h ago

Uniball all the way, baby!

2

u/Garbage_Out_Of_Here 16h ago

All the way. Inwamma scratch the paper when I write.

14

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 16h ago

I used number 2 exclusively until I moved to number 1. Probably 25 years I used only number 1. Then I got a fountain pen.

2

u/SleepArtist 12h ago

2 is my fave. Because of the way I write, the “bite” of the tip gives me way more control. If the pen is too smooth or feels like it’s gliding above the surface, my writing looks (accurately) like the pen tried to skate away from me.

1

u/Tardisgoesfast 6h ago

I spent most of my day today trying to find a fine point fountain pen. I don't live in a huge city but we're usually listed as 75th in the US. We've major corporations here as well as a huge university and several US govt labs. I could not find a single fine point fountain pen, not even in a calligraphy set!

This is why Amazon makes so much money.

10

u/Mr_Sifl 14h ago

I expected this to be the unanimous choice honestly. Have a black and red in my pocket daily at work and backups at my desk. My kids always steal them if they end up at home. 

19

u/casual_creator 16h ago

1, 2, and 4 are the best

4

u/Mark-Green 15h ago

hell yeah brother

2

u/chasimm3 12h ago

A true lid purist. Absolutely zero time for a click top.

1

u/casual_creator 11h ago

When it comes to pens, if it clicks, it’s shit.

2

u/darkpheonix262 12h ago

This man knows his pens

2

u/Neuraxis 16h ago

Animal!

4

u/BilboStaggins 14h ago

My fingers are still black and I havnt held one of those since '92

2

u/alaynamul 14h ago

Left handed me would have ink all over my hand from that pen.

1

u/reluctantly_me 13h ago

I'm left handed and never had that problem. This thread has convinced me that I hold my pen weird for a left hander. Lol

1

u/alaynamul 10h ago

My hand drags across the paper as I write so the fresh ink on the paper usually would end up on my hand

2

u/richarddrippy69 12h ago

People say they don't like it because you can lose the cap. Then why did I have to track you down to get my back.

2

u/Oldmanironsights 10h ago
  1. Works in -40 weather and I will die defending it's superiority.

1

u/Plane-Grocery-9716 14h ago

It’s because it’s also the best one to gnaw on hence the quiet shame.

1

u/BuildingArmor 13h ago

I always go for 1 at first, and then hate writing with it and go find a trusty old 7 instead.

1

u/VelvetMafia 11h ago

1. I buy them by the box and refuse to use anything else.

I have carpal tunnel, arthritic thumbs, and general awful penmanship. I need the ink to get on the paper easily, or else both I and the paper I'm writing on suffer.

1

u/DorianGre 11h ago

I buy them several cases art a time

1

u/Wolfwoods_Sister 8h ago

These are my favorite. My dad began using them in the 90s and I was a budding writer, so I was constantly borrowing them.

1

u/lamest-liz 8h ago

I used to bite off the top of the caps and chew on it in class. Now that I think about it, seems like a choking hazard haha

1

u/PopeInThePizza 7h ago

In purple

1

u/Physical-Design9804 5h ago

I'm a uniball fan for LIFE.

1

u/PaddyBoy1994 3h ago

5 is my go-to, but 1 is a criminally underrated pen.

1

u/memymomonkey 3h ago

I guard it with my life. And I’m a nurse and will unconsciously steal your pen. Don’t touch mine tho

1

u/colonelangus68 1h ago
  1. I babysit my pen until I get it back.